My Little Warrior
by Nefertili
Summary: She seemed indifferent to her son when he showed his concern for his human charge, but little did he know, she was also subject to the same emotions as he. Sessmama's POV, with massive manga spoilers for those who haven't read Ch. 466 onwards yet.


**Disclaimer: **I do not own the anime/manga series Inuyasha (I would have ended the story already AND I would have given Inupapa and Sessmama proper names if I were Rumiko Takahashi). Neither do I own Sesshoumaru, nor his mother, nor any of characters whatsoever connected with them.

**Author's rants: **I came up with this little one-shot after drawing an artwork of Sesshoumaru's canon mother and Inu no Taishou (link is in my profile). Although my 'invented' character posing as Sesshy's mom in my past fanfics is still very much alive in my mind, I have also grown to like Fluffete, or Sessmama, or whatever you'd like to call her (curse you, Takahashi; you create characters but give them no names... -.-). This contains lots of spoilers for those who haven't read the Sessmama/Meidou manga arc, so read at your own risk. :) I'm also very sorry if it's _short_, because I don't exactly have the time to write chaptered fics nowadays. Constructive criticisms are greatly appreciated, but please, flames are a no-no...

...o0o...

**My Little Warrior**

_By Antarel Nefertili_

"Everything...is all right now."

That was what you said to that human girl of yours. Yes, that little one you're fussing over, whose life had been left in hell and I had called back thanks to the Meidou-seki. She's really a daughter to you, isn't she, Sesshoumaru? You would even discard Tenseiga for that girl, as I have seen only moments ago.

Strange, isn't it, my son? Before, you couldn't even stomach the thought of being around humans, but here you are, openly showing your mother that you care for your human charge! As I watch you gently lay a hand on that girl's head as she awakens from the clutches of death, I couldn't help but remember your father.

I'm sure you still cherish the thought of him. I recall how many times in your childhood, you would say, "When I grow up, I want to be just like Father!" Or better yet, how you amused me by taking up the sword far earlier than the time expected for you to do so, hoping that you'd be able to fight alongside the Taishou during his conquests. Or was I wrong? For all I care, you wished to fight and defeat your father someday. A typical youkai, that's what you are. I used to call you 'my Little Warrior,' remember? Ha, I know you would try to take my head off if I called you that these days.

Did you ever foresee that you would be just like him, a sympathizer of humans? Isn't that what you wanted, to be just like the Inu no Taishou? Now, you got double of what you wished! Your sword matured, and you have become like your father...in the strangest ways. As I look at you, I see my Little Warrior, still the same little child-youkai I had once nursed on my breast. Oh, but I am proud of you as a young man too, Sesshoumaru! Mother may not look like it, but she is very pleased regarding how grown-up you have become. No more hide-and-seek; no more of those moments you so detested when I would fix your hair to look just like mine... You have traded your childhood blades for a true sword, and the little warrior in you had since grown into something else.

What is that look I see in your eyes as you gaze upon the little one? Oh, where have I seen that before? Wait, I remember! Your father used to give me that look before. You really bear more likenesses with the Inu Taiyoukai than you admit, my son. But back to what I said, your father, my Lord, used to gaze at me that way too, back during those happy days. He's rather open in showing affection, the Inu no Taishou is. Many times, I have chastised him for kissing me in front of other youkai, but more often than not my words only serve to excite him more. But you know your stoic and cold mother - _that _is something I know you inherited from me - she was often indifferent to your father, no matter what he does.

You may ask, did I ever have feelings (those _human _feelings, you say?) for your dear chichi-ue? Well, dear boy, I'd admit that the prime purpose of your father in entering a relationship with me was to produce a good, strong heir. But your father was more emotionally attached to things than I am, and he is not ashamed to show it, as I have said. I would not have been surprised if it turned out that he had a human for a great-great-grandfather or something, judging by his un-youkai-like attitude. I couldn't understand him at first, I tell you!

"I love you,"he told me once. A great big 'huh' was all that I could say. What love?

What I did? I laughed it off. I was pregnant with you then, but my cold wall was still up and in check; not even your father can penetrate it. I think he strongly wished that I would return at least a fourth of his affections, and I am sorry to say that I disappointed him. Even the birth of his much-awaited heir - you - served little to change my stoic attitude. You were much closer to him than you ever were with me, but since he mated with that human you had withdrawn within yourself and stopped seeing your mother.

Strange, how something began to develop in me when he took that woman as a concubine. I am a youkai, remember? _We _are youkai, and demons are not prone to emotions that are so often the cause of downfall in our lower human counterparts. But just when your father had tired of trying to make me return all the warmth he gave me...that was when I realized how much he meant to me.

Laugh if you wish, my son, but what I say is true. Even your mother was a victim of those emotions that had assaulted your father, and now assaults you as well.

Did I feel jealousy? I don't know. It's a complicated thing, what I am trying to explain to you. Among the Dogs, it is perfectly fine to mate more than once, even to have many mates at the same time, just as long as healthy and useful offspring are the result. Likewise, I did not give my human 'rival' much of a thought. In my eyes, she's the Inu no Taishou's little pet, and it amuses me more than disgusts me.

But, do I love him? That's a different story. Oh, your father did not fully abandon me. How else do you think I have acquired the Meidou-seki, or learned more information about the Sword of Healing than you ever knew? What intellectual tidbits he couldn't pass on to his little human bride, he passed on to me. Basically, I became the guardian of his secrets, and I have been living up that duty faithfully throughout these years. But I now understood that I was not the guardian of his heart. If you think that is a loss to my part, I leave you to decide.

But during our last meeting shortly before his life ended thanks to you-know-what (yes, he would still visit me, Sesshoumaru), after he told me everything about the sword that is your heirloom and entrusted me with the Meidou-seki that would prove vital in one of his most difficult trials for you...he asked me if I missed him.

"_Oh, you have no idea how much I miss you, my Lord!" _

That was what my mind said, but unfortunately, that was not what came out of my lips. "Don't be ridiculous,"was my answer.

He gave me a pained smile then, saying, "It seems you haven't changed at all." Those were the last words I ever heard from him.

Ah, there is so much that he doesn't know! He never knew how much I missed him whenever he spent time with that human lady, but I never told anyone that. The Lady of the West is indifferent to such matters, and shall remain so. But a part of me is certainly very sorry for having caused him so much pain. I am not that much of a fiend, just as I have told that little youkai retainer of yours. Don't get your mother wrong; I never wanted you to die, Sesshoumaru, my boy. I even opened up an escape route for you in hell, but you scorned me! How ungrateful of you! But then...how ungrateful your mother is, as well.

I was privileged to be the first mate of the Inu Taiyoukai; I carried in my womb and gave birth to his only youkai child, yet I never gave him the benefit of knowing how much I really cared for him. Is that so much to ask? I know it's not, but still I denied it to him. It seems it is perfectly justifiable that he searched for another woman because his first mate _appears _not to care about him at all.

And you, my son? I have alienated you from me because of the very same reasons why I have alienated your father. I was there to straighten you up when you grew a wrinkle in your skills or in your character, but I was careful - overly so - to not be too attached to you. Thus, my Little Warrior, you knew your okaa-san as your teacher, and to you the creature you called mother was but a vague shadow in your mind.

I won't deny that it influenced you to become much of what you are now. I won't even be surprised if you hate me - never, not once, did you give me that look you gave your little human girl - but seeing you after many a long time is enough for me.

And now that you've earned what you came here for, nothing's stopping you from leaving. As you go, I stop that human boy you have with you for a moment.

"Boy," I say, "I would ask you one thing. You were able to survive inside hell. Ordinary humans couldn't have done it, unless you..."

"A Shikon fragment," he answers, "is keeping me alive."

Hmph, what a strange lot you have traveling with you, Sesshoumaru: a little imp, and two humans both incapable of being saved by Tenseiga!

But as I told the boy about his inescapable fate, you looked at me from over your shoulder. That was when I saw it; _my _face mirrored in yours. The way your eyes flashed as you took note of my warning...isn't that me? You are still your mother's son, and though I can still see a flicker of what you once were as a little child, for the most part all I can see is my cold self...something I had unwittingly made you become.

Will you ever come back again, Sesshoumaru? Even if you do, I hope next time it won't be about swords that you would consult me about. I have had enough of that! Maybe next time, you would come back and once again be my Little Warrior, and I would finally get to be your mother.

----------Owari----------

Woah, that was pretty serious, yet not so, wasn't it? I am quickly becoming fascinated with Sesshy's parents; it's a shame the animanga could only offer so much info about them. Anyway, that's all for now, folks. Please review, and I hope you'll keep on reading my fics! ;P


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